A couple of weeks ago, I attended a good friend’s wedding. When I arrived, I “bumped” into an acquaintance that I did not see for years. He was with his partner (a young lady). He introduced her to me and asked if I invited anyone to the wedding. I replied, “No, I am happily single”. […]
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Resilience (Factor 6): Self-efficacy
From the book ‘The Resilience Factor’ by Karen Reivich & Andrew Shatte (p.45): “Self-efficacy is our sense that we are effective in the world. It represents our beliefs that we can solve the problems we are likely to experience and our faith in our in our ability to succeed.” “At work, people who have faith […]
How to cope with pushy friends?
Last night over dinner with friends, the topic of coping with pushy friends came up. They are your friends that mean well but may come across as a bit aggressive with their advice to you. My suggestions are (I am probably as “guilty” as anyone else on being a pushy friend at times): 1) Stay […]
Resilience (Factor 5): Empathy
From the book ‘The Resilience Factor’ by Karen Reivich & Andrew Shatte (p.44): Empathy is the ability to “read other people’s cues to their psychological and emotional states. Some of us are adept at interpreting what psychologists call the non-verbals of others – their facial expressions, their tone of voice, their body language – and […]
Survivorship Bias
Early this week I went to the annual medical check-up. When reviewing my medical test results and figures, the doctor told me according to statistics based on my age, ethnicity and geographic residence, my probability of a heart-attack in the next 10 years is 3.1% vs. the group average of 3.4%. He said he was […]
A Touch of Humanity
Last weekend I took the TGV train from Frankfurt to Strasbourg for a visit. My original direct train of 2 hours turned into 4 hours with 3 transfers including a bus ride due to track problem. Despite the delay, I felt grateful to a few good German Samaritans who helped me as I don’t understand […]
Rotterdam
I visited Rotterdam last weekend and was very much inspired by the history of the city. Because of its strategic position as the major port in the Netherlands, it was targeted at the second world war and bombed close to the ground. However, when it was time to rebuild the city, they decided to apply […]
Take Every Compliment
Recently a few people have told me about their experience of what we called “a backhand compliment”. In my own words, it means an apparent compliment with a subtle negative connotation/meaning behind it. Take an extreme example, someone “compliments” an American saying “your English is as good as the English.” Well, my advice: 1) Take […]
American Assassin “Killed” me!
Last week I watched the new movie American Assassin with high expectation. Unfortunately, I was almost “killed” by disappointment. Without disclosing too much of the plot in case some of my blog readers may see it despite my negative review. (Don’t say I did not warn you!) I will summarize in a few words: Banality […]
Resilience (Factor 4): Casual Analysis
From the book ‘The Resilience Factor’ by Karen Reivich & Andrew Shatte (p.41-43) “Casual analysis is a term we use to refer to people’s ability to accurately identify the causes of their problems” “… the most resilient people are those who have cognitive flexibility and can identify all the significant causes of adversities they face, […]