In the U.K., the most over-used word is arguably “sorry”. I personally think the word “sorry” has a primary meaning of wrongdoing or regret which does not apply in some cases when we say sorry in our daily life. There are definitely occasions to apologize to others, but not in all cases. We don’t need to start with a negative mode in our mind for over-using the word “sorry” when in fact it is not the most appropriate response.

For example, if one can’t find time to catch up with a friend or something happened that it is not your fault, one tends to automatically say, “oh, sorry…”. May I suggest these alternatives.
1) Oh, that is a challenge.
2) Oh, that is tough.
3) Oh, that is a shame.
4) Oh, that is unfortunate.
5) Well…

An unfortunate event happened at last night’s Oscar ceremony. The movie La La Land was mistaken for the Best Picture award and later corrected on stage.
What would I do if I were the director of La La Land?
(not necessarily in the order listed below)
1) Find out how the mistake happened and make sure if it does not happen again to other people or me again.
2) Whole-heartedly thank and appreciate the people that made La La Land a huge box office success (being nominated is a great honor in itself as well)
3) Sincerely congratulate the winner Moonlight
4) Accept the result and aim to make even better movies
5) Enjoy the Oscar after party (I heard that it is always fun, not that I was ever invited :>)

I have recently read an excellent book called “Feel the fear and do it anyway” by Susan Jeffers and would like to share some interesting thoughts with you.
Let me start with “The Five Truths about Fear” mentioned by Susan in her book..
“Fear Truth #1: The fear will never go away so long as you continue to grow!
Every time you take a step into the unknown, you will experience fear. There is no point in saying, “When I am no longer afraid, then I will do it.” If you do, you’ll be waiting for a long time. The fear is part of the package.”

I saw the movie La La Land last week and I thought it was 4 out of 5 stars (quite good but not exceptional). I like the story and the plot. In addition, the principal actors Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone did make an effort to act, dance and sing (what else can we ask for).
Now, why is it not 5 out 5 stars? First, the special effects can be much better (perhaps it is to fit the theme of story, a kind of “make-believe”). Second, the dialogues are not great (well – I know it is a musical). Third, Ryan Gosling’s acting is competent but not as outstanding as Emma Stone who did a brilliant job in the film (Yes, the role of Ryan does not allow as much “room” as Emma’s to shine – it is true).

The new US president Trump has stirred up more controversies in a few days that some presidents have done in their entire terms. That aside, I have been reflecting on what one can do in the US during the next 4 years (hopefully just 4 years or shorter). What are the opportunities at an individual level?
1) It may be an opportune time to change career as there will probably be quite a bit of movements in job markets during this turbulence time.
2) Go back to school for higher education
3) Develop yourself as well as help others to stay resilient and objective in the midst of turmoil
4) Form stronger bonding with those who share the same values as you.
5) Learn to accept and work with others that don’t share the same opinions as you.
Keep your “seat belt” on, everyone!

Dear all,
May the year of Rooster,
Bring you loads of laughter;
Fill your day with wonders;
Make everyone a winner!

Last Saturday morning I took a bus to the gym. I noticed something special about the bus driver. He was very kind to wait for passengers to get on the bus instead of “beaming” away from them (believe me – I am sure most people had such experience of running after the bus only to have the door closed in your face). To make up for the waiting time, he would drive one touch faster than other drivers (with the same level of safety in my opinion as long as the driver is paying attention and staying within the speed limit)

It dawned on me that we can also apply that principle in our own life. To make time for others, in particular those we love and care, we can be more efficient in performing some tasks or activities. A friend of mine told me that one of her most efficient times of her life was when she was in Harvard law school and needed to travel long distance to see her then-boyfriend over the weekend.

Today is half way through the month of January in 2017. A popular topic buzzing around is New Year Resolution. My advice:
1) It is not too late to make your New Year resolutions if you have not done so. It is only 2 weeks late and there are 50 more weeks to go! Yes, I am a big fan of New Year resolutions (how can one tell :>)
2) Review and fine-tune your initial New Year resolutions to see they are achievable and realistic. No need to be too hard on yourself and don’t give up yet.
3) Award yourself and give yourself a treat if you have done well so far.
4) Don’t get too upset if you are behind your goals. How to deal with disappointment if part of life. Learn from it and handle it with a positive attitude.

I came across an excellent article in this weekend’s FT written by Jason Butler titled “Money can mean happiness – if it’s spent well”. I found his view very insightful. The suggestion is to use the money you have (regardless your wealth level) wisely to enrich your life and deepen your relationships in a meaningful way. The extract from the article below “speaks” for itself.
“There is also evidence that spending money on life experiences, rather than material possessions, makes you happier. This is because we remember experiences longer than the initial excitement of acquiring something.”
“You are likely to be happier spending money on others to strengthen personal relationships, or give money to causes aligned with your values.”
“Your self worth is not determined by your net worth, but by the quality of your personal relationships, your life experiences and the meaning you derive from your existence.”
Well said!

Happy New Year to all :>
Before having a fresh start on new blogs for 2017, let me finish off the last mini-series on voting reflection from 2016. Apologies for the delay.
My final reflection on the voting events is acceptance and then seeking solutions.
In life, we are sometimes faced with results and consequences that are beyond our control even though we have made our best effort. It is never easy to accept things that are not our wishes but being part of a democratic society and community, we have to respect the final decisions made in the predefined manners that are agreed upon. After a few “emotional” moments (we are only human), I think it may be more productive to accept the results and then move on to seek other ways to improve the current situation.

Reflect on what we can do to mitigate the negative effects may be caused by the “undesirable” results. What are the lessons learned? Are there other opportunities for us? What are our plan B, C & D?

Dwelling on the results and the past will not help us make the right FUTURE decisions. Beat it and move on please!!!